It's Qing

I hate that my things smell of you. I just want to bury all the evidence that this ever happened because it hurts every time I look at it. So I will keep it all in that dusty box under the bed until I'm ready or until this is nothing but a memory that can no longer hurt me. No matter how long that might take. I know I've got to keep my head up and move on and I know I will get there so I'm writing this to remind myself to stay strong. Every time I feel weak and long to stray, I will read this and remind myself that this is what needs to be done and I cannot back down, be soft or wallow anymore. Yes I will still cry. Every morning and every night. And suffer countless more sleepless nights. But I will purge myself of this and only get stronger. Better. And once I relearn how to appreciate being alone again. I will no longer need this. The only way from here is onwards.